Where do we go from here?
by spuffy4ever
Summary: After the fight with the First the Scooby gang gathers to think about what happened and to ponder where they will go from there. S/B, W/T and X/A implied.


This is my first fanfic and probably my last. But I just had to write something after the series finale of BTVS. This is my take on how the show should have ended. And this is what I would have had each group member think.  
  
I am in no way own the characters in this story. They belong to Joss, etc. I'm just doing what Joss said when asked what those who follow Buffy should do at the end, write fanfiction. So here goes nothing.  
  
Buffy  
  
I can't believe it. It's over. We won. The First is defeated. But at such a cost. I can't believe that he's dead. Spike. The one that always had my back. I could count on him. He was always there for me. Loving me. Supporting me. Backing me up yet never trying to take over. He loved me so much. He would never leave me. And now he's gone. I am so going to kill Angel for not telling me what the amulet would do. And now another man that I love has left me. And I'm so going to kill Spike for leaving me when I needed him. And for dying to save the world. That's my job. I'm the slayer, it should have been me.  
  
And Anya is gone too. Sacrificing herself to save Andrew. Who would have thought that this 1,000 year old demon turned human would sacrifice herself to save Andrew. I hope that Xander will be ok. He did love her.  
  
What am I going to do with myself now? I can now be a normal girl. Whatever that means. No more fighting demons and vampires now. I can go to school and live like everyone else. But can I really do that? Can I sit at home at night and not think about all the things trying to take over the world? Slaying is such a part of me. Could I really give it up? Even knowing that there are others to watch over it now? Being normal is all that I've ever wanted. But I don't think that I could give it up. It's who I am. But where will we go from here? I can't believe that this use to be Sunnydale. The home of the hellmouth and my home for the past seven years. Has it really only been seven? It seems more like 50. I've been doing this for so long that I can't remember a time when I wasn't the slayer.  
  
I just have to remember that together we stood at the mouth to hell and won. Me and Faith, the chosen two, and the potentials, who made the choice today to fight. And Giles, more my father then the man who gave me life. Who has taught me just about everything that I know and believe in. And Willow, who has more power than those who gave me my gift. Xander, who always loved me in one way, who fought being half blind and with more courage then most people I know. Who stood by me at the end and survived. Dawnie, my sister who is so much stronger then I've ever given her credit for. Who wanted nothing more than to stand by me and fight at the end. Faith, also my sister, who went down the wrong path for a bit but is now back fighting on my side again. Anya, who I loved in her own way. She kept me grounded and reminded me that the world wasn't all about apocalypses and demons. There were things to live for. And Spike. God, I really did love Spike. I finally told him. After three years of him fighting by my side. And he didn't believe me. But then again I don't really blame him. Even in death he was thinking of me. If only .. But I'll live. I'll live for him. I will find love and beauty again in this world that he saved for me. I do love you Spike. Thank you and I WILL always remember you...  
  
Giles  
  
We did it. We really did it. We defeated the First. And we changed the world. Buffy did it. I'm so proud of her. The girl that I've loved like a daughter just proved that she is the greatest slayer that has ever lived. I need to tell her that I'm proud of her and that I love her. We've had a rough year with all the tension running high because of the First. I know that she said that she has learned everything that she needs to know from me already, but I hope that it doesn't mean that she doesn't need me around anymore. I can't leave her again. Not now. I want to be there for her and Dawn, as they start to put their lives back together. Besides we have work to do. I'm pretty much all that left of the council. Wesley and I. Maybe I'll look him up in LA and we can restart. We also need to get to Cleveland and see about closing that Hellmouth. That and there's the matter of finding all the newly called slayers and teaching them about their powers and training them. I wonder if Buffy, Willow, Xander and Dawn will want the job of training? They can become the new council. I bet they'd love that.  
  
And Willow really came through for us. She tapped into the goodness of magic and did it. She pulled it off. Turning all the potentials in the world into actually slayers. Now I'm proud of her too.  
  
Spike. I can't believe that he saved us. William the Bloody, sacrificing himself for the world. For as he use to say, "happy meals on legs." Maybe he is a better man then we all gave him credit for. He's always helped us. Especially when Buffy was "gone". And now he sacrificed himself to save the world. Thank you, Spike.  
  
Faith  
  
Holy shit we actually pulled it off. B's crazy insane plan worked. And we defeated the First. So this is what it feels like to avert an apocalypse. Kind of different then trying to cause one. But all in all I'm five by five. Not that everyone made it out ok. Amanda, Anya, and Blondie among others. But it was a great fight. I loved it. But now I'm famished and have all this tension built up. Maybe I should go and find Robin.  
  
Speaking of Robin. Shit I have to let him show me that there are good men in the world. That alone is much scarier than any vampires or demons that I'll face. Actually letting myself get to know a guy, and not just getting horizontal with them. But actually knowing them and letting them know me. The whole slayer, messed up girl package. Not sure if I can do this. Maybe I should start running now while I have time.  
  
No wait can't do that. I wanted redemption. I still need to earn it. I need to fight more. No more running. Guess it really is time to see what this is all about.  
  
And what's this about him being prettier than me. No way. I am so much prettier then him. And being just mediocre? NO way in hell. I'm damn good. I rock. Well maybe I'm a little out of practice. I have been in an all women's facility for over two years now. Well that just means that maybe I do need some more practice. Maybe I'll go and find Robin after all. Oh wait can't do that yet. He's hurt. Damn him.  
  
Dawn  
  
We did it! And I actually helped. No more pathetic teenager for me. I actually helped kick some major uber-vamp butt. Stupid Buffy for trying to make me miss the big fight. I'm just really glad that she made it. Even though for a bit I didn't think that she would.  
  
I can't believe that Spike destroyed the town. It's gone. All of it. My house, my journals, my mom's grave. Oh my gosh I'll never get to see my mom's grave ever again. Or get my pictures of her. She's gone now. Really really gone. For good.  
  
Wait a minute, speaking of Spike. Just how did he destroy the town? And where is he anyways? When I see him again I'm going to give him a piece of my mind for destroying the only thing I had left of my mom. Stupid vampire who saved the world and my sister. Thank you Spike.  
  
Xander  
  
She did it. My stupid girl really did it. She sacrificed herself for Andrew. Stupid girl. Should have used him as a human shield instead of sacrificing herself for him. Now she will never know that I did love her. I still love her. I will always love her. She's the only girl that I've ever loved in my life. Look at my other relationship. Cordy. Not something that I like to remember. I try to tell myself that I not myself that year of my life. What was I thinking?  
  
But Anya, I really did love her. And I did want to marry her. I can't believe that I left her at the alter. I should have stepped up and been a man. I should have married her. Then she might still be here. I know that she would.  
  
And Willow, wow. I can't believe what she has gone through. From being my life long friend who was way meek to being someone strong enough to give all the potentials all over the world the slayer strength. She's just amazing.  
  
And Buffy. I don't know what to say about Buffy. In the whole getting ready for the end, I never did get to apologize to her for the mutiny when we kicked her out of the house. I still can't believe that we did that. I'm so embarrassed. She was out of line with wanting to charge back in there, even if she was right about the First and stupid preacher guy guarding something there. But we were even more out of line with how we reacted and treated her. We should have pulled her off to the side and talked to her about it. Not let her be slaughtered and turned on by everyone that she loves.  
  
I'm so glad that Spike is gone. Who cares if he saved the world, I'll feel so much better knowing that he's not around to stalk Buffy with his little obsession. And it's not like we need him for muscle anymore, not when we have all the slayers in the world.  
  
But it's time to go on. We'll mourn Anya and Amanda and the other potentials (it's just so hard to think of them as actual slayers) and we'll go on. It's time to hit the next town and find a Starbucks. I really could use the caffeine boost.  
  
Willow  
  
I did it. I went to the place that was further then the darkest place I've even been and I came out of it ok. No black veiny, scary, want to destroy the Willow. Only white haired Willow. Hmm, wonder what that meant. I can still feel girls all over the world waking up. Their powers are amazing. That scythe is amazing. Buffy was right. It holds so much power in it.  
  
I can't believe that Buffy believes in me that much. If I were her I wouldn't believe in me. Heck I didn't believe in me. But she did. She told them that I had more powers then the men that gave her the slayer powers. I had no idea that she thought that of me.  
  
I saved the world. I wonder if that will tip the balance in my favor after what I did last year. I wonder if that means that Tara will be able to come and visit me now. Cassie said that she couldn't come because of what I had done. I wonder if she can come now. I know that Cassie was really the First dressed up in her clothing, but still. She was probably speaking some truth right. I hope so. I really want to see Tara again. I want to be able to say goodbye. I can't believe that her grave is gone now. I'll never be able to see it again and talk to her. I'll never be able to say goodbye to Mrs. Summers either.  
  
Kennedy, I have to end this. I can't believe that I let it go as far with her as I did. I'm not in love with her. I could never be in love with her after Tara. They are just so different. Tara is the only one for me. I need to mourn her longer. I need to get over her before I can move onto someone else. I was just using Kennedy to stay grounded after everything that happened. I'm so proud of her, she's a slayer now. She has the power that she's always craved. She'll be ok.  
  
And miles from where the remaining inhabitants of Sunnydale stood, over what was once the high school, the ground started to shake. Little by little rocks were moved as if something was trying to come up from underneath. Then suddenly a too white hand breaks through the surface. Rocks are pushed a side as a man crawls up into the light. Little by little he stands until we see his whole height. He shakes his head as if confused and then he sees the sun. "Bloody Hell! Buffy!"  
  
Spike  
  
Buffy! Where is she? I gotta get to her. I know that she made it out alive. I have faith in her. But daft woman. Leaving it until the very end like she did. And she said that she loved me! I know that she didn't really mean it. But to hear those three words from her. I feel like I've been waiting my entire life to hear those words. They made my sacrifice so much easier. I saved the world for her and I do it again a million times. Her and Dawn.  
  
And what the bloody hell. I'm standing in the sun and not bursting into flames. One minute I'm in so much pain I couldn't think straight and then the next minute I wake up buried alive. Alive. I'm actually alive. I can feel my heart beat. I'm in the sun. I can walk in the sun with my girl. If she is really my girl. But she will never be. She is so much better then me. She deserves someone better. But I can watch her doing the things that she was made to do. I just have to get to her and tell her. I don't want her to mourn for me.  
  
Bloody hell I feel like I've lived through a war. Which surprisingly enough isn't far from the truth. I think that I still have some of my vampire traits though. I am healing fast, which is good since I feel like I've been hit by a MAC truck. And I can still hear and see better then expected. Well good. I never want to turn back into William, with the writing bad poetry and all. Never again. I'd rather stake myself then be like that again. But I guess that won't work now since I am human and not a vampire. I wonder what peaches will think when he finds out that I got the shanshu that he's been working for. Ha .. serves him right, bloody poofter that he is. I really want to rub this in his face now.  
  
But first thing to do is find Buffy. Then we'll find the peaches and rub his nose in the fact that I'm human now. Then we'll see who gets the girl.  
  
Buffy  
  
We should all probably get going. We still have wounded that needs to get to the hospital, including myself. But for some reason I can't make myself leave here. I'm leaving behind seven years of my life. For better or worse it was the best and worst times of my life. I feel like I'm leaving a piece of myself behind. And wait a second; what is that coming towards us in the distance? If another evil has risen and wants to give fight right now, it's so dead. Wait, I know that gait. It's Spike!! What is Spike doing here and not dead? Oh my god he looks like a Greek god all risen from the ashes. Wait a second, ashes?!?! Why isn't Spike bursting into flames? He's in the sun. I need to look around. See if I'm the only one seeing things.  
  
Nope must not be, Willow and Xander are looking like they are in shock. Giles is wiping his glasses again. And Dawn, why is she smiling? She looks like she knows a secret.  
  
Wait another second. Spike is human. I'm not getting the vampire wiggins anymore. But what .? I have no clue what's going on. But I'm going to go and find out. Without all these people around.  
  
Buffy watches a little longer as Spike slowly makes his way towards her. Then she jumps down into the crater to meet him. Slowly, steadily they walk towards each other until they were a couple of feet away. Then they stopped, staring at each other. Spike was the one to break the silence, "Took you long enough. Did you miss me luv?" 


End file.
